Tuesday, 8 May 2012

A Tale Of An Old Diary

I am a very opinionated person (read my profile) but when it comes to something personal I am always tight-lipped about it. Even though I am surrounded with best friends, most of the time I can't bring myself to talk to them about personal sensitive topics. I could be very frank about myself and tell them my own misfits but I could never ever tell them EVERYTHING.

That's why I got myself a diary when I was thirteen.

photo from Google Images

The first one was pink with a lock. It is also rose scented (now it smells ancient.haha). I wrote there for three long years. It brings back the first three years of high school. Good old days. It's  very 'cheery' diary. The entries were mostly about my crush-es. Every entry's the same. The only difference was the place and date where I saw my crush. During that time having a crush was a BIG DEAL. So can't tell anyone!!!

My second diary was blue with lock again. Entries were about  my last year in high school and some snippets of college. It's more angst-y and dark. It's very different compared with the first one. I was so angry at that time. And I didn't even know what's I'm so angry about. But I know during that time, I feel like I was trapped in expired sardines' can ready to explode. It seemed like everything is under control, so much in control and I can't breathe.

After that, I got a simple notebook as a journal but I no longer write in  a regular basis kind of thing. I think I outgrew writing in a diary or maybe I found someone that I can really talk to. But I never get tired reading my old diaries. No matter how stupid some entries are, I know that WAS me. I never forget to reflect back.

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